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amethystsregretA TatsumixTsuzuki short story
Set in volume 7 after their implied kiss...
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“… I’ll gladly oblige. I’ll lend you every ounce of strength I’ve got.”
Tsuzuki Asato couldn’t get the words out of his head. The feel of Tatsumi Seiichiro’s hand on his cheek, gently stroking his face, brought back memories. They might have only been partners for three months, but in that time, Tsuzuki had grown attached to the shadow shifter. He may have been distant, yet Tatsumi had been caring towards the ofuda master. Three months, after that, they walked away from each other.
Now they were in Kyoto, drinking tea over lunch in the Imobo restaurant inside of Chionin Temple. Sipping some of his Ujiri, Tsuzuki stole a glance at Tatsumi. Had he really kissed him moments ago? He thought he had imagined it, but his lips told him a different story. He couldn’t deny that he had had deep feelings for Tatsumi all those years ago. He’d forced himself to release them for Tatsumi’s sake though. He’d run the man down. He had no right to burden him with his feelings.
When their orders came up, Tatsumi took a small bite of his sashimi. His upbringing had trained him not to stuff his mouth as the man across from him had already begun to do. He sighed. One truly couldn’t teach an old dog new tricks. Even still, the shinigami barely hid his smile. It was just another one of Tsuzuki’s charms. He had manners, but he was so comfortable in his own skin that he didn’t really care what others thought of his childishness. That persona gave him a sense of safety. The innocence of children was something that even he himself envied, but their fragile nature left them just as vulnerable as Tsuzuki already was. Since he had asked for his transfer, Tsuzuki had tried his hardest to be stronger. It had paid off slowly, but he could never erase his gentle spirit. For the first time in decades, Tatsumi wanted to try to protect him again, but deep in his heart of hearts, he still believed that Kurosaki was the better man for the job…
“You’re eating slower than usual, Tatsumi,” Tsuzuki commented after swallowing another mouthful of rice. “You alright?”
“What?” Tatsumi blinked at the question. Had he actually ‘zoned out’? Shaking his head slightly, he took another bite from his meal. “I’m fine, Tsuzuki. You should really be more concerned with yourself. Wolfing down as much as you have, you could give yourself indigestion.” He smirked. Those wise cracks just came out naturally for him. There was no point in feeling bad about them.
“You always say stuff like that. I haven’t yet, you know,” the shinigami responded as he knocked on the tabletop. It couldn’t hurt to be careful. “If you don’t eat your food faster, I can’t promise I won’t start in on it.” Tatsumi may have lots of money, but Tsuzuki was used to being dirt poor even in life. You couldn’t unlearn instincts like that.
“That sounds like you,” Tatsumi replied with a smile. “However, I also can’t promise the shadows on this table won’t try to stop you, should you attempt to.” His blue eyes held an evil laugh that made the other shrink back. “Good boy.”
The two of them continued to indulge in their inside jokes and small talk. They’d had enough heavy talk for one day. It was time to enjoy themselves. Tsuzuki had to admit he missed spending alone time with his old partner. Tatsumi couldn’t deny that the informal interaction was refreshing. Both of them suddenly smiled at each other, catching the others’ gaze. The laughter quieted. Silence fell on them both for a moment before one of them spoke in a low voice…
“Tatsumi… Why did you kiss me?”
The shadow shifter gaped. He almost went to cover his lips, as if such a thing could hide what he’d done. How was he supposed to answer that? It wasn’t planned. He hadn’t intended to stir up such an intimate moment. He hadn’t felt those emotions in decades, so he hadn’t been able to resist his body’s primal wants.
“I guess you don’t have an answer, huh? That’s alright. I was just curious, is all.” Tsuzuki shrugged. There was no way Tatsumi felt that way about him, but he mentally slapped himself for thinking that. He remembered what the god of the Count’s book had said about Tatsumi and the Butler’s feelings. Tatsumi longed for his happiness just as much as he did Tatsumi’s. He didn’t want to push the subject though. It could ruin their wonderful day together.
“I have an answer.”
“Tatsumi…” The amethyst gaze gaped back at the man across from him. His chestnut crown was hung slightly, hiding his eyes from view. What kind of answer was he going to give to make him this humbled?
“Tsuzuki… Asato, when you asked me to help you protect this girl, I saw something in you that I had always wanted to see. Before, you always looked to me for comfort as your weak foundations crumbled over and over. I didn’t know what I could do for you, so I selfishly pushed you away, even though I wanted to help you. Today… you looked at me with confidence. You don’t need me anymore, but you wanted my help. I was so impressed that… I thought…”
“Tatsumi,” Tsuzuki put a hand on the others’, “maybe we should hold off on Kodaiji Temple and Shimogamo Saryu today. We should head back for the hotel. We can talk there.”
Tatsumi looked up at the older shinigami. For once, Tsuzuki was showing his age. He was smiling back with understanding. It almost made a blush flush across his cheeks. All he’d wanted to do was brighten the disheartened shinigami, so he could get Muraki out of his head and refocus on his mission. The secretary felt embarrassed that Tsuzuki was the one helping him now. He waved for the check with his free hand.
“Yes, I think that would be a good idea.”
The walk back to the Granvia Hotel was quiet. The two men stayed side by side, staring straight ahead of each other. They were both thinking the exact same thing: How do I tell him? It wasn’t a difficult thing to do, but the reactions held more anxiety over them then anything. Their feelings had been held back for decades, silenced for the sake of the other. They couldn’t keep ignoring this any longer. Too much had happened between them since then. It was time to approach the threshold they never crossed.
“At least, we made it through the souvenir shopping today. I doubt I would have had the time to do it later.” Tatsumi finally spoke up when he closed the hotel door behind them. Tsuzuki walked over to the window. His hands were in his pockets still. He didn’t reply. He was letting the other know he wouldn’t let him distract him. Tatsumi glanced at him, realizing this instantly. He placed the bags on a desk across from the beds. “I suppose you’re sharper than ever right now. Where should I begin?”
“You said I impressed you,” Tsuzuki replied in a solemn tone. He took a seat on the small couch beside the second bed. Crossing his legs and folding his hands in his lap, he was in his listening position. He looked up at Tatsumi, giving his undivided attention. “You were going to tell me what you were thinking. I stopped you, so we could speak in private. I think that’s a good place.”
“Hm. Right to the point...” Tatsumi smiled as he pushed his glasses up by the bridge. He turned about to lean against the desk. He could feel Tsuzuki’s eyes on him, but he couldn’t look at them just yet. He had to speak first, or he would fall dumb under those amethysts. He sighed heavily, attempting to exhale his apprehensions. It half worked.
“When we were working together, you always turned to me full of fear and self-loathing. You needed to be held together like a broken doll. I felt suffocated having that responsibility. It wasn’t a first time for me, and I didn’t want to do it again. That was why I asked to be transferred to desk work. I ran away from you.
“It wasn’t because I didn’t care. I was afraid I’d have to watch someone else I
cared about wither away… Being needed, I suppose, is a phobia of mine. All these years, I’ve kept my distance from you. I thought I could stop caring, but you see how much good that did.” He huffed a light laugh for a moment. “That brings me to today, Asato. When you asked me to help you protect this girl, I saw the strength I had hoped you would find in your eyes. You didn’t need me for once. You wanted me to help. All I could think was ‘he wants me’. Before I realized what I was doing… I’d kissed you.”
Tsuzuki gaped from his seat. Tatsumi’s words made it sounds as if he had feelings as well. Could he be carrying the same emotions he did? He kept himself from running up to the shinigami and grabbing him by the collar. Why hadn’t he told him any of this sooner? Taking a deep breath, he grounded himself once more. He had to hear him out. Tatsumi must have had a reason for his silence.
“If you felt this way, why haven’t you said anything before today? I didn’t grow a backbone overnight. What held you back?”
“To be honest…” He stared outside the window. A heavy gaze watched the clouds move lazily across the sky. “I hoped you would be able to find yourself, and we might work together again in the future. I knew I wasn’t helping you with my cold nature, so I thought you might find yourself inside of your own skin without my pessimism holding you down. You didn’t though, not until Kurosaki came along that is…”
“Hisoka? What does he have to do with any of this?” Tsuzuki uncrossed his legs to lean forward. Why would he bring up Hisoka now?
“He proved to be better than the others,” Tatsumi replied grimly. “Of all your partners, you’ve actually lasted the longest with him. Did you know it’s been almost two years already? I’ve been counting. I always counted how long you lasted with partners. You’ve grown stronger with him. It might not have been my original hope, but you found your strength with him. I’ve even talked to him when he would get discouraged or uncertain on how to understand you. I felt… I feel he is the right person to work by your side.”
“What does that have to do with you wanting me to want you…?” Gripping his knees, Tsuzuki closed his eyes. He was trying to keep his temper in check, but the fact of the matter was that Tatsumi was doing to exact same thing he did back then. He was walking away. Neither of them had found happiness this way, nor had they moved on. Sure he was broken, but so was Tatsumi! He wanted someone to want him, no more dependants. If that was all he wanted, Tsuzuki could have given him that years ago…
Tatsumi looked at Tsuzuki at last. He gaped at the frustration in his body language. What had he said to upset him like this? He clenched his jaw. He had promised himself he wouldn’t do this to Tsuzuki anymore. He was too hurt to take it. He deserved better. He stood from the desk to walk up to the couch. Kneeling before the shinigami, Tatsumi lifted his right hand to graze that left cheek once more. It was hot this time, as if he were going to cry.
“Tatsumi… Please tell me what you feel… I need to know…” Holding the hand there, Tsuzuki looked into Tatsumi’s ocean blue eyes. Holding the gaze as he had at the restaurant, he searched for his answers.
“Asato…” Tatsumi’s voice was softer than Tsuzuki ever remembered it being. His eyes were full of longing and sadness.
“Forget about Hisoka! You’re talking to me right now! Tell me the truth, Seiichiro!” The demands sounded like begging to Tatsumi’s ears. His eyes were about to unleash tears. Why did he always hurt the one he longed for?
“I… I…” Tatsumi couldn’t find his words. Tsuzuki never called him by his birth name. It sounded so strange to hear it. Those hauntingly beautiful amethysts were calling for his answer. He had to respond, but just as he had thought, he’d lost his nerve. Pulling Tsuzuki’s face down to his, he gently caressed those lips for a second time. He hoped his beloved would understand.
Tsuzuki felt tears fall. Tatsumi did love him. He wanted him to love him back. He cupped the shinigami’s face in his hands as he kissed him back. There was no need for words anymore. The truth had been exposed. To hell with everything else, he wanted this moment to last as long as possible.
Tatsumi couldn’t retreat now. He could feel the desire in Tsuzuki’s kiss. Had Tsuzuki loved him all along? He recalled what he had said to the Butler in the magic novel. He had said he wanted him to be happy as well. Just like the day he’d broken the news of their split to him, he must have felt the same way then. Both of them were hurting because they let the other go. He’d had enough of seeing Tsuzuki suffer. No more, he was going to put an end to that!
Tsuzuki gaped when he felt a hand unbutton his coat. In that moment of distraction, Tatsumi slipped his tongue inside Tsuzuki’s mouth. A moan escaped Tsuzuki’s throat as he felt a hand push his coat off his shoulders. His mind slowly wrapped around what Tatsumi was doing. It made him turn pink in the face.
Releasing Tsuzuki’s cheek, Tatsumi moved in on the tie and shirt. Tossing the black tie on the floor, his fingers blindly unbuttoned the shirt beneath. Pushing it passed the broad shoulders, Tatsumi broke away from the lip lock. He leaned down to suck on a stiffening nipple. Tsuzuki gave a soft cry, but he didn’t shy away, gripping Tatsumi’s shoulders. Using the moment of opportunity, Tatsumi pushed the coat and shirt down the pale arms. Gulping, he was never going to get used to how beautifully sculpted Tsuzuki was.
Tsuzuki threw his head back with a gasp, nearly striking the wall. The wet tongue on his chest sent shivers through him. This didn’t feel the same as when Muraki touch him. Instead of clamming up in fear, his body was reacting. He moaned timidly. His bare arms reached up to grasp the auburn head with his hands. He wanted more, so much more.
Pulled closer to Tsuzuki’s chest, Tatsumi felt the heat of his own breath. He closed his mouth around the side of the man’s chest, sucking harder. He could feel the twitching of Tsuzuki’s body, but the gasping begged him to continue. When he finally released the flesh, a dark purple mark was seen at the site. He blushed. He’d left a hickey for the first time.
The pause in Tatsumi’s sucking gave Tsuzuki a moment of clarity. He leaned forward to unbutton Tatsumi’s coat. Tatsumi shrugged it off once it was loose, pulling his own tie off himself. He looked back up to kiss the fairer man again. This gave Tsuzuki the opportunity to unbutton the shirt; however, he only made it halfway before Tatsumi broke the kiss.
“This is going to kill my back. Let’s move to the bed.”
“Huh…? Bed…?” Tsuzuki blinked. He looked at the bed right next to them. It did look more comfortable. He looked back at the stoic face. Tatsumi looked hungry and impatient. The purple eyes gaped in awe. He nodded, speechless at the unfamiliar expression.
Seeing Tsuzuki was swooned already, Tatsumi helped him to stand up. Just as the coat and shirt fell to the couch, Tsuzuki’s belt came off in a flash. Tatsumi wasn’t the type to waste time, and apparently, sex wasn’t an exception to his nature. He kissed his former partner once more. He could feel hands grasp onto his biceps. He was looking for stability. He was going to need it, since the Ministry’s Secretary had just finished unzipping his pants…
Tsuzuki didn’t even realize until he felt the pants collect about his ankles. He gulped. Tatsumi was so fast! He knew that repression could lead to impulsive behavior, so with several decades of restraint, he felt a chill run through his body at what was yet to come. He finally finished getting that shirt unbuttoned, but the farthest he got after that was pulling it out of Tatsumi’s pants. The feeling of hands inside his boxers made him gasp, completely throwing him off!
“Sei!” A soft, timid cry left Tsuzuki’s mouth.
Tatsumi couldn’t help smiling at the reaction. Tsuzuki was so adorable when he was embarrassed. He eased his hands passed the tight buttocks. It was flexed, making the shadow shifter growl sinisterly. Why was he enjoying this so much? He hadn’t a clue, but why question when he hadn’t felt this excited in all his life.
Tsuzuki moaned again. It was clear that he was about to be the first one naked in this. Why was he always so easy?! It wasn’t fair! He tried to pout, but once the boxers were on the floor, the obviously more dominate participant swept the other’s feet out from under him. He fell to the bed, where Tatsumi quickly followed.
“Asato… If you don’t want this, please tell me now… before I can’t hold myself back anymore.” Tatsumi’s eyes gazed down sadly at the amethysts. He didn’t want to hurt Tsuzuki ever again, especially like this. He wanted the one he held most dear to want this as much as he did. Otherwise, he’d just have repeated the cycle he had tried so desperately to escape.
“Sei…” Tsuzuki pulled his face closer for a kiss. There was no need to say anything. He’d wanted Tatsumi to return his feelings for years, and ever since he’d met Professor Mitani, he’d wanted to share this forbidden love with him as well. He didn’t want to waste anymore time that they might not have. “Don’t hold back ever again. Alright?”
The smile on Tsuzuki’s face made Tatsumi want to shed tears. Enough talking! He kissed back with an intensity he had not yet shown. He would keep that promise. No more holding back. He pushed the lighter man higher onto the bed with his hips, crawling onto the bed as he went.
Tsuzuki gingerly pulled the glasses he’d watched Tatsumi push up so many times off his face. Reaching for the dresser on the other side of the bed, he placed them down just as gently. He then moved to peel that shirt off him. It proved to be a challenge with those hands grasping and grazing his sides. It was making him salivate, which felt strange to him since this wasn’t food. That was when he noticed a throbbing between his legs. It was severe to the point that he couldn’t ignore. Was he that far along already?!
Tatsumi felt something rise against his thigh. He almost paused, but he was enjoying the kiss far too much to do so. Tsuzuki was already erect? He should have realized this would happen when he took off his boxers, but he felt slightly proud that he was pleasing the shinigami that well. He hoped he could keep it up.
“Sei…” Tsuzuki gasped. “Your belt… I can’t get it…” Tatsumi raised his hips slightly to help the blindly grasping hands in their task. “Thanks…” Once the buckle was unfastened, Tsuzuki yanked the belt off. He broke the last belt loop off the expensive pants. He gaped in terror. “Oops…”
“Sh.” Tatsumi shushed him. Placing a hand over the slim lips, he whispered, “Something was bound to break. I’m just glad it wasn’t hotel property. I can get them tailored later.” With that, he kissed the stunned shinigami.
Tsuzuki’s legs moved on their own, stroking up the others’ legs before clinging to his hips. When he felt one of Tatsumi’s hands graze over the back of his thigh, he gave a shutter and threw his head back as his whole body shook. How was Tatsumi this good at pleasure? Wasn’t he new to this, or like himself, had he just been listing to people talk? Either way, it was making that aching between his legs worse.
“Sei… Please… I can’t… get… the pants…”
Tatsumi glanced up at the shinigami’s face. He was almost gone, and he’d only been stroking with his nails. He guessed that technique really did work after all. He didn’t mind if Tsuzuki didn’t completely strip him. It wasn’t going to kill his drive. With one hand, he unbuttoned his trousers and lowered the zipper. That was when he felt Tsuzuki’s legs ease the pants off. He just kicked his socks off with his feet, but that was when he noticed Tsuzuki’s were already gone…
“Asato… were you not wearing socks today…?”
“Not now, Seiichiro!” Tsuzuki moaned, grabbing the others’ face to kiss him. It was an effective means of shutting him up. With the brief moment of control he’d reclaimed, Tsuzuki even managed to move Tatsumi’s briefs off with his feet before losing it once their cocks knocked.
“Asato…” Tatsumi blushed at the bold move. He hadn’t expected that one, but at the same time, he had waited decades to do this with him. Perhaps the hen pecking could be saved for a later time. He smiled at the feel of Tsuzuki’s manhood beside his own. He never thought it would feel quite like that. Leaning down, he kissed his beloved shinigami once more. It wasn’t anything fancy, but it was filled with passion.
Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around the muscular trunk, pulling himself as close as possible. He wanted to be near Tatsumi, to feel his warmth. He could feel the rush of his heartbeat, pulsing through his own chest. After a few moments, his heart sped up to match it. It was his turn to insert his tongue passed the shadow shifter’s teeth, exploring the inside and dancing with Tatsumi’s. Hearing Tatsumi moan, he clung tighter.
Tatsumi reached down to knead the warm sack that was exposed between Tsuzuki’s legs. It made Tsuzuki cry out. He didn’t even have words to beg. Once he threw his head back, Tatsumi worked back on caressing that slender neck with his lips. He felt a hand grip his scalp, holding it in place. Tsuzuki must have wanted more of that. His free hand reached up to massage a hard nipple, producing more cries from his partner. Tatsumi decided to do his utmost to pleasure Tsuzuki before they actually committed the act. He’d always fantasized about how he would do this, so it was time to fulfill those dreams…
Tsuzuki’s mind seemed to fade in and out of madness. His body was craving more of the torture he was going through, but he didn’t reject any of it. It was agonizing to his need, but he wanted more, so much more. He gasped between cries, but he couldn’t form so much as a word with that air. His amethysts gaped at the wall behind them. Sweat was running down to the bed from his flesh. His muscles flexed at different intervals all over his body.
He wondered if this was what it was like to be with the one you wanted. He sure didn’t feel this way when Muraki touched him. Tatsumi’s hands felt different on his body. Even his lips touch was completely different. He wasn’t afraid as he was with Muraki. He pulled Tatsumi closer. He wanted Tatsumi to cover him, making a barrier to the doctor. Finally, he found his voice, but it came out in a cry…
“Sei! Please…! Now! Now!”
Tatsumi looked up at the pleading. He realized how erect the shinigami was. He even discovered at last how much the voice had aroused him. They were both in need of it. He gulped. He wasn’t fully sure how to enter without hurting Tsuzuki. Everything he’d ever dared to imagine would surely injure him, and he didn’t want to do that. Still, even between a man and woman, there was pain. He furrowed his brow. He’d just have to do it as gently as possible…
“Asato…” He said in a low voice to prevent sounding as embarrassed as he felt. “I need to prepare you first. Otherwise, there won’t be anything to help…”
“You mean make you slicker, right…?” Tsuzuki gasped, making Tatsumi pause. Tsuzuki reached down to grasp the shadow shifter’s stiff penis. A gasp escaped Tatsumi’s lips at the grip. Almost instantly, Tsuzuki began to stroke the whole of the shaft. Escape was futile as Tsuzuki held Tatsumi’s lower back down. The secretary cried out desperately at the speed Tsuzuki was going. It was driving him mad! Tsuzuki gulped at the voice. He wasn’t used to hearing Tatsumi sound like that. He suddenly got an idea. He inched down the bed between Tatsumi’s legs…
“A-Asa…to…!” Tatsumi gripped the comforter beneath them. He’d never thought Tsuzuki would do something like this is his wildest imaginings. And if that wasn’t shocking enough, he suddenly felt Tsuzuki hand move to the base of his rod just to make room for his warm mouth to close in around him. “Asato!”
Tsuzuki engulf almost half of the shaft in his mouth. He could feel the pulsing blood rushing through it as he sucked. Unconsciously, he began to move his head to slide up and down the penis. He realized that the more his saliva covered the shaft the easier it was to slide. Slick was the key after all. Even as he got harder pleasing Tatsumi, he longed to keep going. He didn’t know why he wanted to so badly. Perhaps it was the antagonizing sound of Tatsumi, crying out his name. Maybe it was the taste of cum seeping out of the head into his mouth. Could it have been Tatsumi’s hips thrusting down toward him? He didn’t know. He just crossed his legs to try shutting up his manhood’s physical screaming at him to indulge a while longer.
Try as he may, Tatsumi couldn’t control his body’s instinctive thrusting. Tsuzuki’s hot oral cavity was maddening. It was tantalizing to his senses. He was just barely keeping himself from releasing. As much as he didn’t want to do this to Tsuzuki, he also was beginning to long for the action to continue. He’d never been touched before, especially like this. It was indescribable to his intellect. He just knew he wanted Tsuzuki to keep going as long as he could. Finally, when he knew his control was going to give any moment, he begged desperately!
“Asato! Not like this! I don’t want to release like this! Please!”
Tsuzuki stopped instantly. Tatsumi took the opportunity to pull his manhood out of Tsuzuki mouth. After all this time, he could see that Tsuzuki was still submissive. It must be engraved in his mind, a true masochist. The shadow shifter was by no means a sadist, at least in bed, so he knew he would have to be careful with the shinigami. Helping him to rise back up the bed, Tatsumi kissed him, a thank you.
That was when he noticed Tsuzuki was still wearing his watch. He reached to remove it, and since Tsuzuki wasn’t in any position to protest it, the shinigami gaped at the scars beneath. Tsuzuki gaped up at him, helplessly. Tatsumi looked down at him with heartache in his eyes. It all made sense now. Those scars could only mean Tsuzuki’s death had been at his own hand. No wonder he was so broken. Tsuzuki looked so ashamed, pulling his wrist close to his chest. Tatsumi stopped him, raising the wrist to his lips to kiss the scars. Tsuzuki gaped up at him as Tatsumi smiled down at him.
“I’m ready now.”
Tsuzuki felt Tatsumi raise his legs up. They were nearly touching his chest. Tatsumi took a moment to suck on his two middle fingers before he snaked his arms behind Tsuzuki's knees. The Ofuda master wondered why he’d done that. He suddenly felt the moist fingers touching his flesh. It sent a chill through him. Tatsumi looked at him once more, making sure there were no reservations. Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around Tatsumi’s neck, whispering in his ear.
“I’m ready, Sei.”
Tatsumi didn’t wait a second longer. His fingers slipped inside the passage. Tsuzuki shuttered at the feel of something entering him that way. It was so foreign, but at the same time, it felt good. As Tatsumi worked the opening a bit, he managed to widen it enough to add a third finger. Tsuzuki threw his head back as he trembled. He still held onto Tatsumi's torso, desperately as if he might be swept away. He squeezed his eyes shut as he whimpered. Just when he was getting used to the third finger, Tsuzuki felt a fourth.
"Ah! Sei...!"
Tatsumi had to rest his forehead on Tsuzuki's chest. He couldn't look at the man. It was all he could do to just prepare him like this, so he didn't tear him up in the actual act. Once he felt enough give from his fingering, he reached for his erection, feeling it was still damp from the layer of saliva Tsuzuki had left. Holding the head up to the stretched entrance, Tatsumi didn’t plunge inside immediately, easing in all the way slowly instead.
Tsuzuki's eyes shot wide open as he cried out loudly. His back arched sharply. Tears formed in his eyes. It hurt, but it felt right. This was how it felt to be with the one you wanted and longed for. Love hurt, but as long as you supported one another, you could overcome that pain. His whole body flexed, clinging to the shadow shifter. As he began to hump upward gradually, the tears finally fell as Tsuzuki cried.
“Asato…” Tatsumi had to admit that this entry was different from Tsuzuki’s mouth. It was far tighter. He couldn’t hold back a moan at the sensation running through his nerves. Tsuzuki’s humping didn’t help either. He gasped as he tried to ground himself again. He answered Tsuzuki’s body with a thrust, making Tsuzuki cry out more. Tatsumi tried to understand why Tsuzuki wouldn’t look at him. Was he doing something wrong? That was when he saw the tears dripping into his beautiful, dark hair. “Asato… Forgive me…!”
“Don’t stop…” Tsuzuki gasped. “Don’t stop… Please…”
“But I’m hurting you…”
“That’s okay… We’re fusing… together… It’s… meant to be… painful… Don’t stop, Sei… Don’t stop…”
Tatsumi shed a tear at Tsuzuki’s words. He was doing it again, showing his age. He knew he had no more experience than he did at sexual intercourse, but he knew what it meant to be with someone. The term ‘becoming one’ took on a whole new meaning for him. He had promised to give Tsuzuki all of his strength. He would do that now by becoming one and filling his body with it. He started thrusting again, picking up speed as he went. Tsuzuki’s voice both crushed and kept him going. This was the burden of making love to someone. You had to hold onto them, keeping them from falling apart. He swallowed his fear.
After several moments, Tatsumi felt as if his inside had exploded. He practically screamed before falling to Tsuzuki’s chest, gasping for air. Tsuzuki had cried with him, for he too had released. They just lied there for a moment, gathering their wits. Tsuzuki was the first to move. He reached his hand up to stroke Tatsumi’s hair. A smile grew on his tired face. His other hand rubbed the slick back gingerly.
“I love you… Sei…”
“I… love you… Asato…”
Once they recovered from their first round, several more followed. Hisoka and Watari didn’t return until later that evening, so the room was all theirs to rest up. They eventually ended up under the sheets, where they both fell asleep, holding one another. After that afternoon, Tatsumi and Tsuzuki began to smile at one another more often. They went forward with Tsuzuki’s plan to infiltrate Mariko’s school. Unfortunately, that doctor proved to outsmart them once again. When Tsuzuki and Hisoka found Mariko in the snow, Tatsumi was relieved for Tsuzuki, but he couldn’t help thinking this was the calm before the storm. During a meeting with the Chief, an alarm went off. His heart froze in his chest. Why did he always have to predict disaster?
“Tsuzuki!” Watari cried once they finally found the shinigami in the rubble.
“Wait, Watari!” Tatsumi yelled, holding the engineer back.
“But he’s right there! We have to help him!”
“Look…” They both looked up to see the Suzaku hovering above Tsuzuki. She was screeching like a mother bird, defending her babes. “She won’t let us near. We’ll have to wait for her to calm down.”
“Tatsumi…” The blonde pointed at Tsuzuki. “Is that… a head…?”
“Mariko.” Tatsumi cursed himself for not realizing Muraki had released her unscathed. It had been a trap from the beginning, but for what?
“Tsuzuki!” Hisoka ran up behind them. He looked frantic. Tatsumi gasped realizing his empathy would pick up on Tsuzuki’s subconscious.
“Kurosaki! No, stay back!”
Too late. Hisoka collapsed to his knees. His eyes gaped in horror. Tears rushed down his face. Tatsumi and Watari were stunned at the level of turmoil the young shinigami was showing. Just what was rolling around in Tsuzuki’s spirit?
“Tatsumi! Look! More shikigami have arrived!” Watari pointed out Byakko, Souryuu, and a black serpent they had never seen before. Just what was going on? Tsuzuki shouldn’t be able to summon that many shikigami at once! Could he have more power than they imagined? Sagatanasu’s invasion came to them. Had that been Tsuzuki’s power and not his that had over-thrown Hisoka?
“Hm hm hm…” Tatsumi flinched at the laugh. Turning slowly, he gaped in horror at Muraki, kneeling beside Tsuzuki. “Go to sleep, Mr. Tsuzuki. I’m sure you want to.” Tsuzuki’s eyes closed, and he slumped against the doctor.
Hisoka completely collapsed at last. Watari tried running after the homicidal physician. Tatsumi just slumped to his knees, helpless. What could they do? Muraki had them completely pinned. As a white light enveloped them, Tatsumi’s blue eyes welled up with tears. There was nothing they could do. Muraki had stolen Tsuzuki from them. All the shadow shifter could hear in his mind was Tsuzuki’s voice, pleading with him to save him from Muraki. He dropped his face to his hands, weeping.
“Asato… Please hold on… We’ll find you… Somehow… we’ll find you…!”
-10/03/10 Jade_the_inujin
Set in volume 7 after their implied kiss...
-
“… I’ll gladly oblige. I’ll lend you every ounce of strength I’ve got.”
Tsuzuki Asato couldn’t get the words out of his head. The feel of Tatsumi Seiichiro’s hand on his cheek, gently stroking his face, brought back memories. They might have only been partners for three months, but in that time, Tsuzuki had grown attached to the shadow shifter. He may have been distant, yet Tatsumi had been caring towards the ofuda master. Three months, after that, they walked away from each other.
Now they were in Kyoto, drinking tea over lunch in the Imobo restaurant inside of Chionin Temple. Sipping some of his Ujiri, Tsuzuki stole a glance at Tatsumi. Had he really kissed him moments ago? He thought he had imagined it, but his lips told him a different story. He couldn’t deny that he had had deep feelings for Tatsumi all those years ago. He’d forced himself to release them for Tatsumi’s sake though. He’d run the man down. He had no right to burden him with his feelings.
When their orders came up, Tatsumi took a small bite of his sashimi. His upbringing had trained him not to stuff his mouth as the man across from him had already begun to do. He sighed. One truly couldn’t teach an old dog new tricks. Even still, the shinigami barely hid his smile. It was just another one of Tsuzuki’s charms. He had manners, but he was so comfortable in his own skin that he didn’t really care what others thought of his childishness. That persona gave him a sense of safety. The innocence of children was something that even he himself envied, but their fragile nature left them just as vulnerable as Tsuzuki already was. Since he had asked for his transfer, Tsuzuki had tried his hardest to be stronger. It had paid off slowly, but he could never erase his gentle spirit. For the first time in decades, Tatsumi wanted to try to protect him again, but deep in his heart of hearts, he still believed that Kurosaki was the better man for the job…
“You’re eating slower than usual, Tatsumi,” Tsuzuki commented after swallowing another mouthful of rice. “You alright?”
“What?” Tatsumi blinked at the question. Had he actually ‘zoned out’? Shaking his head slightly, he took another bite from his meal. “I’m fine, Tsuzuki. You should really be more concerned with yourself. Wolfing down as much as you have, you could give yourself indigestion.” He smirked. Those wise cracks just came out naturally for him. There was no point in feeling bad about them.
“You always say stuff like that. I haven’t yet, you know,” the shinigami responded as he knocked on the tabletop. It couldn’t hurt to be careful. “If you don’t eat your food faster, I can’t promise I won’t start in on it.” Tatsumi may have lots of money, but Tsuzuki was used to being dirt poor even in life. You couldn’t unlearn instincts like that.
“That sounds like you,” Tatsumi replied with a smile. “However, I also can’t promise the shadows on this table won’t try to stop you, should you attempt to.” His blue eyes held an evil laugh that made the other shrink back. “Good boy.”
The two of them continued to indulge in their inside jokes and small talk. They’d had enough heavy talk for one day. It was time to enjoy themselves. Tsuzuki had to admit he missed spending alone time with his old partner. Tatsumi couldn’t deny that the informal interaction was refreshing. Both of them suddenly smiled at each other, catching the others’ gaze. The laughter quieted. Silence fell on them both for a moment before one of them spoke in a low voice…
“Tatsumi… Why did you kiss me?”
The shadow shifter gaped. He almost went to cover his lips, as if such a thing could hide what he’d done. How was he supposed to answer that? It wasn’t planned. He hadn’t intended to stir up such an intimate moment. He hadn’t felt those emotions in decades, so he hadn’t been able to resist his body’s primal wants.
“I guess you don’t have an answer, huh? That’s alright. I was just curious, is all.” Tsuzuki shrugged. There was no way Tatsumi felt that way about him, but he mentally slapped himself for thinking that. He remembered what the god of the Count’s book had said about Tatsumi and the Butler’s feelings. Tatsumi longed for his happiness just as much as he did Tatsumi’s. He didn’t want to push the subject though. It could ruin their wonderful day together.
“I have an answer.”
“Tatsumi…” The amethyst gaze gaped back at the man across from him. His chestnut crown was hung slightly, hiding his eyes from view. What kind of answer was he going to give to make him this humbled?
“Tsuzuki… Asato, when you asked me to help you protect this girl, I saw something in you that I had always wanted to see. Before, you always looked to me for comfort as your weak foundations crumbled over and over. I didn’t know what I could do for you, so I selfishly pushed you away, even though I wanted to help you. Today… you looked at me with confidence. You don’t need me anymore, but you wanted my help. I was so impressed that… I thought…”
“Tatsumi,” Tsuzuki put a hand on the others’, “maybe we should hold off on Kodaiji Temple and Shimogamo Saryu today. We should head back for the hotel. We can talk there.”
Tatsumi looked up at the older shinigami. For once, Tsuzuki was showing his age. He was smiling back with understanding. It almost made a blush flush across his cheeks. All he’d wanted to do was brighten the disheartened shinigami, so he could get Muraki out of his head and refocus on his mission. The secretary felt embarrassed that Tsuzuki was the one helping him now. He waved for the check with his free hand.
“Yes, I think that would be a good idea.”
The walk back to the Granvia Hotel was quiet. The two men stayed side by side, staring straight ahead of each other. They were both thinking the exact same thing: How do I tell him? It wasn’t a difficult thing to do, but the reactions held more anxiety over them then anything. Their feelings had been held back for decades, silenced for the sake of the other. They couldn’t keep ignoring this any longer. Too much had happened between them since then. It was time to approach the threshold they never crossed.
“At least, we made it through the souvenir shopping today. I doubt I would have had the time to do it later.” Tatsumi finally spoke up when he closed the hotel door behind them. Tsuzuki walked over to the window. His hands were in his pockets still. He didn’t reply. He was letting the other know he wouldn’t let him distract him. Tatsumi glanced at him, realizing this instantly. He placed the bags on a desk across from the beds. “I suppose you’re sharper than ever right now. Where should I begin?”
“You said I impressed you,” Tsuzuki replied in a solemn tone. He took a seat on the small couch beside the second bed. Crossing his legs and folding his hands in his lap, he was in his listening position. He looked up at Tatsumi, giving his undivided attention. “You were going to tell me what you were thinking. I stopped you, so we could speak in private. I think that’s a good place.”
“Hm. Right to the point...” Tatsumi smiled as he pushed his glasses up by the bridge. He turned about to lean against the desk. He could feel Tsuzuki’s eyes on him, but he couldn’t look at them just yet. He had to speak first, or he would fall dumb under those amethysts. He sighed heavily, attempting to exhale his apprehensions. It half worked.
“When we were working together, you always turned to me full of fear and self-loathing. You needed to be held together like a broken doll. I felt suffocated having that responsibility. It wasn’t a first time for me, and I didn’t want to do it again. That was why I asked to be transferred to desk work. I ran away from you.
“It wasn’t because I didn’t care. I was afraid I’d have to watch someone else I
cared about wither away… Being needed, I suppose, is a phobia of mine. All these years, I’ve kept my distance from you. I thought I could stop caring, but you see how much good that did.” He huffed a light laugh for a moment. “That brings me to today, Asato. When you asked me to help you protect this girl, I saw the strength I had hoped you would find in your eyes. You didn’t need me for once. You wanted me to help. All I could think was ‘he wants me’. Before I realized what I was doing… I’d kissed you.”
Tsuzuki gaped from his seat. Tatsumi’s words made it sounds as if he had feelings as well. Could he be carrying the same emotions he did? He kept himself from running up to the shinigami and grabbing him by the collar. Why hadn’t he told him any of this sooner? Taking a deep breath, he grounded himself once more. He had to hear him out. Tatsumi must have had a reason for his silence.
“If you felt this way, why haven’t you said anything before today? I didn’t grow a backbone overnight. What held you back?”
“To be honest…” He stared outside the window. A heavy gaze watched the clouds move lazily across the sky. “I hoped you would be able to find yourself, and we might work together again in the future. I knew I wasn’t helping you with my cold nature, so I thought you might find yourself inside of your own skin without my pessimism holding you down. You didn’t though, not until Kurosaki came along that is…”
“Hisoka? What does he have to do with any of this?” Tsuzuki uncrossed his legs to lean forward. Why would he bring up Hisoka now?
“He proved to be better than the others,” Tatsumi replied grimly. “Of all your partners, you’ve actually lasted the longest with him. Did you know it’s been almost two years already? I’ve been counting. I always counted how long you lasted with partners. You’ve grown stronger with him. It might not have been my original hope, but you found your strength with him. I’ve even talked to him when he would get discouraged or uncertain on how to understand you. I felt… I feel he is the right person to work by your side.”
“What does that have to do with you wanting me to want you…?” Gripping his knees, Tsuzuki closed his eyes. He was trying to keep his temper in check, but the fact of the matter was that Tatsumi was doing to exact same thing he did back then. He was walking away. Neither of them had found happiness this way, nor had they moved on. Sure he was broken, but so was Tatsumi! He wanted someone to want him, no more dependants. If that was all he wanted, Tsuzuki could have given him that years ago…
Tatsumi looked at Tsuzuki at last. He gaped at the frustration in his body language. What had he said to upset him like this? He clenched his jaw. He had promised himself he wouldn’t do this to Tsuzuki anymore. He was too hurt to take it. He deserved better. He stood from the desk to walk up to the couch. Kneeling before the shinigami, Tatsumi lifted his right hand to graze that left cheek once more. It was hot this time, as if he were going to cry.
“Tatsumi… Please tell me what you feel… I need to know…” Holding the hand there, Tsuzuki looked into Tatsumi’s ocean blue eyes. Holding the gaze as he had at the restaurant, he searched for his answers.
“Asato…” Tatsumi’s voice was softer than Tsuzuki ever remembered it being. His eyes were full of longing and sadness.
“Forget about Hisoka! You’re talking to me right now! Tell me the truth, Seiichiro!” The demands sounded like begging to Tatsumi’s ears. His eyes were about to unleash tears. Why did he always hurt the one he longed for?
“I… I…” Tatsumi couldn’t find his words. Tsuzuki never called him by his birth name. It sounded so strange to hear it. Those hauntingly beautiful amethysts were calling for his answer. He had to respond, but just as he had thought, he’d lost his nerve. Pulling Tsuzuki’s face down to his, he gently caressed those lips for a second time. He hoped his beloved would understand.
Tsuzuki felt tears fall. Tatsumi did love him. He wanted him to love him back. He cupped the shinigami’s face in his hands as he kissed him back. There was no need for words anymore. The truth had been exposed. To hell with everything else, he wanted this moment to last as long as possible.
Tatsumi couldn’t retreat now. He could feel the desire in Tsuzuki’s kiss. Had Tsuzuki loved him all along? He recalled what he had said to the Butler in the magic novel. He had said he wanted him to be happy as well. Just like the day he’d broken the news of their split to him, he must have felt the same way then. Both of them were hurting because they let the other go. He’d had enough of seeing Tsuzuki suffer. No more, he was going to put an end to that!
Tsuzuki gaped when he felt a hand unbutton his coat. In that moment of distraction, Tatsumi slipped his tongue inside Tsuzuki’s mouth. A moan escaped Tsuzuki’s throat as he felt a hand push his coat off his shoulders. His mind slowly wrapped around what Tatsumi was doing. It made him turn pink in the face.
Releasing Tsuzuki’s cheek, Tatsumi moved in on the tie and shirt. Tossing the black tie on the floor, his fingers blindly unbuttoned the shirt beneath. Pushing it passed the broad shoulders, Tatsumi broke away from the lip lock. He leaned down to suck on a stiffening nipple. Tsuzuki gave a soft cry, but he didn’t shy away, gripping Tatsumi’s shoulders. Using the moment of opportunity, Tatsumi pushed the coat and shirt down the pale arms. Gulping, he was never going to get used to how beautifully sculpted Tsuzuki was.
Tsuzuki threw his head back with a gasp, nearly striking the wall. The wet tongue on his chest sent shivers through him. This didn’t feel the same as when Muraki touch him. Instead of clamming up in fear, his body was reacting. He moaned timidly. His bare arms reached up to grasp the auburn head with his hands. He wanted more, so much more.
Pulled closer to Tsuzuki’s chest, Tatsumi felt the heat of his own breath. He closed his mouth around the side of the man’s chest, sucking harder. He could feel the twitching of Tsuzuki’s body, but the gasping begged him to continue. When he finally released the flesh, a dark purple mark was seen at the site. He blushed. He’d left a hickey for the first time.
The pause in Tatsumi’s sucking gave Tsuzuki a moment of clarity. He leaned forward to unbutton Tatsumi’s coat. Tatsumi shrugged it off once it was loose, pulling his own tie off himself. He looked back up to kiss the fairer man again. This gave Tsuzuki the opportunity to unbutton the shirt; however, he only made it halfway before Tatsumi broke the kiss.
“This is going to kill my back. Let’s move to the bed.”
“Huh…? Bed…?” Tsuzuki blinked. He looked at the bed right next to them. It did look more comfortable. He looked back at the stoic face. Tatsumi looked hungry and impatient. The purple eyes gaped in awe. He nodded, speechless at the unfamiliar expression.
Seeing Tsuzuki was swooned already, Tatsumi helped him to stand up. Just as the coat and shirt fell to the couch, Tsuzuki’s belt came off in a flash. Tatsumi wasn’t the type to waste time, and apparently, sex wasn’t an exception to his nature. He kissed his former partner once more. He could feel hands grasp onto his biceps. He was looking for stability. He was going to need it, since the Ministry’s Secretary had just finished unzipping his pants…
Tsuzuki didn’t even realize until he felt the pants collect about his ankles. He gulped. Tatsumi was so fast! He knew that repression could lead to impulsive behavior, so with several decades of restraint, he felt a chill run through his body at what was yet to come. He finally finished getting that shirt unbuttoned, but the farthest he got after that was pulling it out of Tatsumi’s pants. The feeling of hands inside his boxers made him gasp, completely throwing him off!
“Sei!” A soft, timid cry left Tsuzuki’s mouth.
Tatsumi couldn’t help smiling at the reaction. Tsuzuki was so adorable when he was embarrassed. He eased his hands passed the tight buttocks. It was flexed, making the shadow shifter growl sinisterly. Why was he enjoying this so much? He hadn’t a clue, but why question when he hadn’t felt this excited in all his life.
Tsuzuki moaned again. It was clear that he was about to be the first one naked in this. Why was he always so easy?! It wasn’t fair! He tried to pout, but once the boxers were on the floor, the obviously more dominate participant swept the other’s feet out from under him. He fell to the bed, where Tatsumi quickly followed.
“Asato… If you don’t want this, please tell me now… before I can’t hold myself back anymore.” Tatsumi’s eyes gazed down sadly at the amethysts. He didn’t want to hurt Tsuzuki ever again, especially like this. He wanted the one he held most dear to want this as much as he did. Otherwise, he’d just have repeated the cycle he had tried so desperately to escape.
“Sei…” Tsuzuki pulled his face closer for a kiss. There was no need to say anything. He’d wanted Tatsumi to return his feelings for years, and ever since he’d met Professor Mitani, he’d wanted to share this forbidden love with him as well. He didn’t want to waste anymore time that they might not have. “Don’t hold back ever again. Alright?”
The smile on Tsuzuki’s face made Tatsumi want to shed tears. Enough talking! He kissed back with an intensity he had not yet shown. He would keep that promise. No more holding back. He pushed the lighter man higher onto the bed with his hips, crawling onto the bed as he went.
Tsuzuki gingerly pulled the glasses he’d watched Tatsumi push up so many times off his face. Reaching for the dresser on the other side of the bed, he placed them down just as gently. He then moved to peel that shirt off him. It proved to be a challenge with those hands grasping and grazing his sides. It was making him salivate, which felt strange to him since this wasn’t food. That was when he noticed a throbbing between his legs. It was severe to the point that he couldn’t ignore. Was he that far along already?!
Tatsumi felt something rise against his thigh. He almost paused, but he was enjoying the kiss far too much to do so. Tsuzuki was already erect? He should have realized this would happen when he took off his boxers, but he felt slightly proud that he was pleasing the shinigami that well. He hoped he could keep it up.
“Sei…” Tsuzuki gasped. “Your belt… I can’t get it…” Tatsumi raised his hips slightly to help the blindly grasping hands in their task. “Thanks…” Once the buckle was unfastened, Tsuzuki yanked the belt off. He broke the last belt loop off the expensive pants. He gaped in terror. “Oops…”
“Sh.” Tatsumi shushed him. Placing a hand over the slim lips, he whispered, “Something was bound to break. I’m just glad it wasn’t hotel property. I can get them tailored later.” With that, he kissed the stunned shinigami.
Tsuzuki’s legs moved on their own, stroking up the others’ legs before clinging to his hips. When he felt one of Tatsumi’s hands graze over the back of his thigh, he gave a shutter and threw his head back as his whole body shook. How was Tatsumi this good at pleasure? Wasn’t he new to this, or like himself, had he just been listing to people talk? Either way, it was making that aching between his legs worse.
“Sei… Please… I can’t… get… the pants…”
Tatsumi glanced up at the shinigami’s face. He was almost gone, and he’d only been stroking with his nails. He guessed that technique really did work after all. He didn’t mind if Tsuzuki didn’t completely strip him. It wasn’t going to kill his drive. With one hand, he unbuttoned his trousers and lowered the zipper. That was when he felt Tsuzuki’s legs ease the pants off. He just kicked his socks off with his feet, but that was when he noticed Tsuzuki’s were already gone…
“Asato… were you not wearing socks today…?”
“Not now, Seiichiro!” Tsuzuki moaned, grabbing the others’ face to kiss him. It was an effective means of shutting him up. With the brief moment of control he’d reclaimed, Tsuzuki even managed to move Tatsumi’s briefs off with his feet before losing it once their cocks knocked.
“Asato…” Tatsumi blushed at the bold move. He hadn’t expected that one, but at the same time, he had waited decades to do this with him. Perhaps the hen pecking could be saved for a later time. He smiled at the feel of Tsuzuki’s manhood beside his own. He never thought it would feel quite like that. Leaning down, he kissed his beloved shinigami once more. It wasn’t anything fancy, but it was filled with passion.
Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around the muscular trunk, pulling himself as close as possible. He wanted to be near Tatsumi, to feel his warmth. He could feel the rush of his heartbeat, pulsing through his own chest. After a few moments, his heart sped up to match it. It was his turn to insert his tongue passed the shadow shifter’s teeth, exploring the inside and dancing with Tatsumi’s. Hearing Tatsumi moan, he clung tighter.
Tatsumi reached down to knead the warm sack that was exposed between Tsuzuki’s legs. It made Tsuzuki cry out. He didn’t even have words to beg. Once he threw his head back, Tatsumi worked back on caressing that slender neck with his lips. He felt a hand grip his scalp, holding it in place. Tsuzuki must have wanted more of that. His free hand reached up to massage a hard nipple, producing more cries from his partner. Tatsumi decided to do his utmost to pleasure Tsuzuki before they actually committed the act. He’d always fantasized about how he would do this, so it was time to fulfill those dreams…
Tsuzuki’s mind seemed to fade in and out of madness. His body was craving more of the torture he was going through, but he didn’t reject any of it. It was agonizing to his need, but he wanted more, so much more. He gasped between cries, but he couldn’t form so much as a word with that air. His amethysts gaped at the wall behind them. Sweat was running down to the bed from his flesh. His muscles flexed at different intervals all over his body.
He wondered if this was what it was like to be with the one you wanted. He sure didn’t feel this way when Muraki touched him. Tatsumi’s hands felt different on his body. Even his lips touch was completely different. He wasn’t afraid as he was with Muraki. He pulled Tatsumi closer. He wanted Tatsumi to cover him, making a barrier to the doctor. Finally, he found his voice, but it came out in a cry…
“Sei! Please…! Now! Now!”
Tatsumi looked up at the pleading. He realized how erect the shinigami was. He even discovered at last how much the voice had aroused him. They were both in need of it. He gulped. He wasn’t fully sure how to enter without hurting Tsuzuki. Everything he’d ever dared to imagine would surely injure him, and he didn’t want to do that. Still, even between a man and woman, there was pain. He furrowed his brow. He’d just have to do it as gently as possible…
“Asato…” He said in a low voice to prevent sounding as embarrassed as he felt. “I need to prepare you first. Otherwise, there won’t be anything to help…”
“You mean make you slicker, right…?” Tsuzuki gasped, making Tatsumi pause. Tsuzuki reached down to grasp the shadow shifter’s stiff penis. A gasp escaped Tatsumi’s lips at the grip. Almost instantly, Tsuzuki began to stroke the whole of the shaft. Escape was futile as Tsuzuki held Tatsumi’s lower back down. The secretary cried out desperately at the speed Tsuzuki was going. It was driving him mad! Tsuzuki gulped at the voice. He wasn’t used to hearing Tatsumi sound like that. He suddenly got an idea. He inched down the bed between Tatsumi’s legs…
“A-Asa…to…!” Tatsumi gripped the comforter beneath them. He’d never thought Tsuzuki would do something like this is his wildest imaginings. And if that wasn’t shocking enough, he suddenly felt Tsuzuki hand move to the base of his rod just to make room for his warm mouth to close in around him. “Asato!”
Tsuzuki engulf almost half of the shaft in his mouth. He could feel the pulsing blood rushing through it as he sucked. Unconsciously, he began to move his head to slide up and down the penis. He realized that the more his saliva covered the shaft the easier it was to slide. Slick was the key after all. Even as he got harder pleasing Tatsumi, he longed to keep going. He didn’t know why he wanted to so badly. Perhaps it was the antagonizing sound of Tatsumi, crying out his name. Maybe it was the taste of cum seeping out of the head into his mouth. Could it have been Tatsumi’s hips thrusting down toward him? He didn’t know. He just crossed his legs to try shutting up his manhood’s physical screaming at him to indulge a while longer.
Try as he may, Tatsumi couldn’t control his body’s instinctive thrusting. Tsuzuki’s hot oral cavity was maddening. It was tantalizing to his senses. He was just barely keeping himself from releasing. As much as he didn’t want to do this to Tsuzuki, he also was beginning to long for the action to continue. He’d never been touched before, especially like this. It was indescribable to his intellect. He just knew he wanted Tsuzuki to keep going as long as he could. Finally, when he knew his control was going to give any moment, he begged desperately!
“Asato! Not like this! I don’t want to release like this! Please!”
Tsuzuki stopped instantly. Tatsumi took the opportunity to pull his manhood out of Tsuzuki mouth. After all this time, he could see that Tsuzuki was still submissive. It must be engraved in his mind, a true masochist. The shadow shifter was by no means a sadist, at least in bed, so he knew he would have to be careful with the shinigami. Helping him to rise back up the bed, Tatsumi kissed him, a thank you.
That was when he noticed Tsuzuki was still wearing his watch. He reached to remove it, and since Tsuzuki wasn’t in any position to protest it, the shinigami gaped at the scars beneath. Tsuzuki gaped up at him, helplessly. Tatsumi looked down at him with heartache in his eyes. It all made sense now. Those scars could only mean Tsuzuki’s death had been at his own hand. No wonder he was so broken. Tsuzuki looked so ashamed, pulling his wrist close to his chest. Tatsumi stopped him, raising the wrist to his lips to kiss the scars. Tsuzuki gaped up at him as Tatsumi smiled down at him.
“I’m ready now.”
Tsuzuki felt Tatsumi raise his legs up. They were nearly touching his chest. Tatsumi took a moment to suck on his two middle fingers before he snaked his arms behind Tsuzuki's knees. The Ofuda master wondered why he’d done that. He suddenly felt the moist fingers touching his flesh. It sent a chill through him. Tatsumi looked at him once more, making sure there were no reservations. Tsuzuki wrapped his arms around Tatsumi’s neck, whispering in his ear.
“I’m ready, Sei.”
Tatsumi didn’t wait a second longer. His fingers slipped inside the passage. Tsuzuki shuttered at the feel of something entering him that way. It was so foreign, but at the same time, it felt good. As Tatsumi worked the opening a bit, he managed to widen it enough to add a third finger. Tsuzuki threw his head back as he trembled. He still held onto Tatsumi's torso, desperately as if he might be swept away. He squeezed his eyes shut as he whimpered. Just when he was getting used to the third finger, Tsuzuki felt a fourth.
"Ah! Sei...!"
Tatsumi had to rest his forehead on Tsuzuki's chest. He couldn't look at the man. It was all he could do to just prepare him like this, so he didn't tear him up in the actual act. Once he felt enough give from his fingering, he reached for his erection, feeling it was still damp from the layer of saliva Tsuzuki had left. Holding the head up to the stretched entrance, Tatsumi didn’t plunge inside immediately, easing in all the way slowly instead.
Tsuzuki's eyes shot wide open as he cried out loudly. His back arched sharply. Tears formed in his eyes. It hurt, but it felt right. This was how it felt to be with the one you wanted and longed for. Love hurt, but as long as you supported one another, you could overcome that pain. His whole body flexed, clinging to the shadow shifter. As he began to hump upward gradually, the tears finally fell as Tsuzuki cried.
“Asato…” Tatsumi had to admit that this entry was different from Tsuzuki’s mouth. It was far tighter. He couldn’t hold back a moan at the sensation running through his nerves. Tsuzuki’s humping didn’t help either. He gasped as he tried to ground himself again. He answered Tsuzuki’s body with a thrust, making Tsuzuki cry out more. Tatsumi tried to understand why Tsuzuki wouldn’t look at him. Was he doing something wrong? That was when he saw the tears dripping into his beautiful, dark hair. “Asato… Forgive me…!”
“Don’t stop…” Tsuzuki gasped. “Don’t stop… Please…”
“But I’m hurting you…”
“That’s okay… We’re fusing… together… It’s… meant to be… painful… Don’t stop, Sei… Don’t stop…”
Tatsumi shed a tear at Tsuzuki’s words. He was doing it again, showing his age. He knew he had no more experience than he did at sexual intercourse, but he knew what it meant to be with someone. The term ‘becoming one’ took on a whole new meaning for him. He had promised to give Tsuzuki all of his strength. He would do that now by becoming one and filling his body with it. He started thrusting again, picking up speed as he went. Tsuzuki’s voice both crushed and kept him going. This was the burden of making love to someone. You had to hold onto them, keeping them from falling apart. He swallowed his fear.
After several moments, Tatsumi felt as if his inside had exploded. He practically screamed before falling to Tsuzuki’s chest, gasping for air. Tsuzuki had cried with him, for he too had released. They just lied there for a moment, gathering their wits. Tsuzuki was the first to move. He reached his hand up to stroke Tatsumi’s hair. A smile grew on his tired face. His other hand rubbed the slick back gingerly.
“I love you… Sei…”
“I… love you… Asato…”
Once they recovered from their first round, several more followed. Hisoka and Watari didn’t return until later that evening, so the room was all theirs to rest up. They eventually ended up under the sheets, where they both fell asleep, holding one another. After that afternoon, Tatsumi and Tsuzuki began to smile at one another more often. They went forward with Tsuzuki’s plan to infiltrate Mariko’s school. Unfortunately, that doctor proved to outsmart them once again. When Tsuzuki and Hisoka found Mariko in the snow, Tatsumi was relieved for Tsuzuki, but he couldn’t help thinking this was the calm before the storm. During a meeting with the Chief, an alarm went off. His heart froze in his chest. Why did he always have to predict disaster?
“Tsuzuki!” Watari cried once they finally found the shinigami in the rubble.
“Wait, Watari!” Tatsumi yelled, holding the engineer back.
“But he’s right there! We have to help him!”
“Look…” They both looked up to see the Suzaku hovering above Tsuzuki. She was screeching like a mother bird, defending her babes. “She won’t let us near. We’ll have to wait for her to calm down.”
“Tatsumi…” The blonde pointed at Tsuzuki. “Is that… a head…?”
“Mariko.” Tatsumi cursed himself for not realizing Muraki had released her unscathed. It had been a trap from the beginning, but for what?
“Tsuzuki!” Hisoka ran up behind them. He looked frantic. Tatsumi gasped realizing his empathy would pick up on Tsuzuki’s subconscious.
“Kurosaki! No, stay back!”
Too late. Hisoka collapsed to his knees. His eyes gaped in horror. Tears rushed down his face. Tatsumi and Watari were stunned at the level of turmoil the young shinigami was showing. Just what was rolling around in Tsuzuki’s spirit?
“Tatsumi! Look! More shikigami have arrived!” Watari pointed out Byakko, Souryuu, and a black serpent they had never seen before. Just what was going on? Tsuzuki shouldn’t be able to summon that many shikigami at once! Could he have more power than they imagined? Sagatanasu’s invasion came to them. Had that been Tsuzuki’s power and not his that had over-thrown Hisoka?
“Hm hm hm…” Tatsumi flinched at the laugh. Turning slowly, he gaped in horror at Muraki, kneeling beside Tsuzuki. “Go to sleep, Mr. Tsuzuki. I’m sure you want to.” Tsuzuki’s eyes closed, and he slumped against the doctor.
Hisoka completely collapsed at last. Watari tried running after the homicidal physician. Tatsumi just slumped to his knees, helpless. What could they do? Muraki had them completely pinned. As a white light enveloped them, Tatsumi’s blue eyes welled up with tears. There was nothing they could do. Muraki had stolen Tsuzuki from them. All the shadow shifter could hear in his mind was Tsuzuki’s voice, pleading with him to save him from Muraki. He dropped his face to his hands, weeping.
“Asato… Please hold on… We’ll find you… Somehow… we’ll find you…!”
-10/03/10 Jade_the_inujin
